overdrawn and still happy

Look at that snow. It's so heavy and so deep. I will attempt the shovelling soon. I need to get to work but first, a pathway out the door is necessary.

Meanwhile, didn't sleep too well last night. Ended up driving in incredibly poor conditions, but I had the ball and so I ran with it. I kept imagining swerving off the highway and landing so deep in the side woods I was never found again until Spring. I had packed some old pizza for the trip to woods hole yesterday so I wouldve survived for a week or two. I didn't swerve off the road but I did see many plows languishing along the roads not plowing when I finally got off 91 in Greenfield. It was around 4 am. Why weren't they plowing? Were they all jerking off or smoking cigarettes?

The dog wants to go for a walk but little does he know I am preoccupied with householding chores.

ooh, chicken soup and dancing movies from the 1930's for new years eve. worth leaving home for-

almost over

The vacation with the kid is almost over. I drive him back tomorrow. Many things have happened while he was here..we went tubing, my house sprung a couple distressing leaks, my secret crush has bloomed into a hotbed of hopeful excitement, Sal's idol talked about him over a family dinner, I started a book, I didn't do laundry, lets see, what else?

interesting quotes and tiring facts

Argh. I was hanging out by the desk with Kid and I could hear the dog in the kitchen dicking around which I foolishly ignored until *bang! *crash! and I saw that the creature had nudged the coffee can filled with chicken oil off the counter all over the floor so he could drink the elixir. Just something else to clean up.

"I'm totally bringing my guitar and going over to Coko's house and playing Sonic Youth songs." My Kid says excitedly as he goes upstairs for a shower. I've already given him the starfucker talk so what else can I do? Of course the situation is much much less superficial than this paragraph. Last night we went to a movie with his galpals (including aforementioned friend) and during the movie one character plays Sonic Youth covering the Carpenters to turn on the main character, Juno, to music he thinks she may like.

Sidenote: Why is it (and I don't really mean to phrase this as a question as I know the answer) that most court and dance in this day and age, amongst people I know and assimilate with, includes a great deal of music talk? My hands smell like fried chicken oil from the cleanup.

So our protagonist, Juno, comes back to see this guy and they get into an argument culminating in her accusation, "And I bought a Sonic Youth album and its just noise!"
which made me and the Kid chuckle. Later he repeated the quote to Coko and she agreed, "It is!"

The Kid asked me to spell Thelonious for him today and I believe I put the second O in the wrong spot. oops.

I think I need to get out of this drippy house.

drive and drive and drive..drove

It's that nice time when it's still the first night Kid has come, the dog is walked, we have fressed and are satisfied to be just hanging around the downstairs together. There are days of togetherness ahead and we are mellow. Kid has brought his tiniest of tiny amps, guitar and new pedal. I have gifted to him another pedal and he has them all hooked up and is noodling on them while im-ing with the galpals south of here.

My drive down to the cape was uneventful and the drive back was pleasant with the coversation about music, always about music, and a little bit about kids and school and the weekend to come and...where are we going for dinner?


The Sierra Grille, of course. We both got the pork medallions with sides of mac and cheese and potatoes.

Meet Me In St Louis

Good Ol' Christmas.


I really accomplished something today-now, after a bath for the dog and a shower for myself, I put on a nice warm but attractive outfit and sit down at the desk to look through the pics I took today and watch Judy Garland do her best on the tv.
"I love him more than I can say"

Dogzilla on Xmas

ok, xmas. Pickles is happy with his gift, so I guess so far, so good. Tomorrow I see if the Kid likes the pedal, the cd, the tshirt, etc etc-of course he will, I have impeccable taste in all things cool and great.

I continue drinking coffee and listening to "Sitting Next To Brian"'s latest. Brian is pretty great. Also included in this xmas morning: vacuuming and mopping living room and washing dog's bedding. It's all pretty great. The housemate left for a day with the family so my house is all me and dog. I like it.

aw, not so great ps. Dog snacked right through this major piece of rubber already. (resigned grrr)

Walking through the park, at half past nine..

Listening to that old standard, Phoebe Snow. Every song, every note is so familiar, so warmly predictable, "Please god, help me. I'm so poor. Send me something to wear and something to eat. Because I want to cross over to Easy Street." That's the end. It reminds me of this time of year. Suddenly, as I walked into the Bricker at the end of my workday, the beginning of my vacation, some of her vocals started running through my head and I knew it was time to put her on. I came upstairs and landed in the queen with dog and cat and the laptop, album playing for us in the dark afternoon. I think it may be naptime, don't you? The animals...my family...are showing me the way to sleepyseedsville.

I have a nice evening to look forward to: sushi dinner with friends at a friend's and then gingerbread and eggnog at another friend's. I wish my current crush was going to be there, eager to kiss me. Of course I hold this fomenting obsession close to my chest..like the most fragile elaborate seashell which I must carry for miles with the dearest wish that none of its curlicues get knocked off or banged into. It is held so painstakingly that not even he knows of my desire. Ooh, I feel a little naughty thinking of it as I wrap my arms around the naptime pillow.

Once a year, whether I need it or not

I look at that picture of the sea otter and wish I was him/her, swimming around with a nice fur on. I should go walk the dog. I should go clean the offices but instead I am here fishing around on the computer looking at crap and feeling melancholy.

It's funny that this blog is the one I turn to to kvetch and feel sorry for myself in. Fucking hilarious, in fact. I did write a blog a day in November on another blog venue on the internet. It was cool.

So this is xmas. I have gotten some nice things: a big bottle of vodka, a nice bottle of wine, some pretty plates and yummy moisturizer that I would never buy for myself. I even got a booty call last night! whoo hoo. I didn't actually take the offer seriously, of course. What if I did, though? What if I drove to Northampton at 4 in the morning and made out with this guy-what would it get me? He already has a girlfriend, did I mention that? AND!

and nothing. eh, I will just climb up into a tree and find a little hidey-hole until it's time to walk the dog again. No matter how much I booze it up I can't assuage. There has been no assuaging whatsoever. (insert self-pitying groan here--replace with giggle of absurdity=welcome to my world)